And the smartest, funniest, and most intimidating people on LiveJournal were usually also on the message board.
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In the late nineties, for an English major who Wanted to Be a Writer, that was a serious thrill.Īs a praxisless but punk-identifying teen with good intentions, no analysis, and no idea how to exist in a body, anonymously contributing stories with cuss words in them to FM was an empowering way to say, “I have no idea what’s going on with me or my gender, but I do not care for it.” I lost interest pretty quickly and moved on to my own zines and in-person writing groups, but because those things involved identifying information, I put away the What Is Gender stuff for a few years.Īs I processed the fact that I was trans, mostly on LiveJournal, I started connecting with a like-minded community of trans people who also were unhappy with the options for living we saw available as trans people. You’d just send FM a story you’d furtively made up instead of sleeping, and then they would publish it-publicly, on the internet!-and then strangers would tell you that they hated it. I mean, how many websites have been around since the late nineties?įictionmania is the first place I was published, unless you count a short story in a high school lit mag that was about 40 percent unattributed Tori Amos lyrics. Its stories, on the whole, are not politically or stylistically progressive, but it’s accumulated, like, forty thousand stories over the last twenty-five years, so it’s definitely doing something that’s compelling for a lot of people.
If you were trying to figure out what was going on with your gender in the late nineties and early aughts, you tended to end up there.
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And if you’re hungry for that post-post-vaporwave retro “2002 internet” aesthetic, great news: it hasn’t updated its design since it came online in 1998.įictionmania is a free archive of user-contributed stories on the theme of gender change. It wasn’t until the night after that reading, lying awake and beating myself up for not having a good answer, that I thought of a pretty good one. We are so steeped in for-profit social media today that it’s hard to remember anything else. I struggled to come up with a decent answer. So instead of celebrating myself, I want to use this opportunity to say thanks, and to think through some of the influences and experiences that shaped the novel.Īt one point in Nevada, Maria mentions the “stupid 2002 internet.” At a Q&A following a reading on the 2013 book release tour, I was asked what that meant. At the very least, this idea occludes the work other people had done that made Nevada possible. People have called Nevada “ground zero for modern trans literature,” and while I get that-before it was published, I don’t think I’d read a novel with a trans character who I didn’t at least sort of hate-I don’t really feel like a genius visionary who invented literature centering marginalized experiences. It’s been out of print for a few years, but in June, Farrar, Straus and Giroux will bring it back into print. You may or may not have heard of it, but if there are trans people in your life who are readers, they probably have. Photo courtesy of the author.Īlmost ten years ago, I published a novel called Nevada with a small press called Topside that doesn’t exist anymore.